By Colin Baird-Taylor
Artwork by Justin Negard
When you were a child, what did you want to be when you grew up? Did you dream of becoming a professional athlete, astronaut or possibly a famous actor? What about fishing bikes out of canals, serving as a human punching bag or literally watching paint dry? These are real jobs in other countries, and possibly another child’s dream. Here are some of the most unusual jobs we found around the world.
1. Bike fishermen, Netherlands, $9,600-18,000/year
Have you ever crashed a bicycle into a canal? In Amsterdam, even with the countless bike lanes and parking racks throughout the city, many tourists still end up crashing their bikes into the city’s famous canals. It’s such a frequent occurrence that Waternet, Amsterdam’s water management company, hires bike fishermen to literally fish bikes out of the water via a giant claw. Once the bikes are retrieved, they are sent to a scrap yard.
2. Granny Police, Choayang, China, $540/year
Don’t think of the “granny police” as actual police; think of them as the government spying on you. The “granny police” are approximately 60,000 retired men and women in China’s largest and most populated district who make sure everyone is on the right side of the line, both culturally and morally. They give the Chinese government around 20,000 tips per month, ranging from terrorism and theft to fraud; and drug use. According to The China Project, they also report “girls who always go home around 2 or 3 a.m. with different men” and residents who look constantly ill or abnormally skinny.
3. Human punching bag, China, $42,000/year
Have you ever been so furious or outraged that you needed to hit something? Or someone? Another unusual job in China is being that person, you know, the one who gets punched in the gut. From what we can tell, only one person holds this job at the moment, Wuhan resident Xie Shuiping, who often hangs around bars and nightclubs literally waiting for people to punch him. Each person gets three punches to knock Shuiping over, but if you fail to do so, be prepared to pay up. On the other hand, if you do successfully knock him over, you win free drinks at the bar. Although this will serve as a sidegig for most, this is actually Shuiping’s job.
4. Paint watcher, Numerous countries, $47-69,000/year
No this is not a joke. These people literally watch paint dry; it’s actually a vital job for paint manufacturers. Paint companies need to know the texture, color and saturation of the paint as it dries, so they employ full time watchers to sit and watch their paint dry, observing its quality and durability, noting if the paint starts to peel ensuring it meets company standards. Sometimes, the paint watchers even observe the paint under a microscope to check for inconsistencies.
5. People pusher, Tokyo, Japan, $96,000/year
Have you ever tried to cram clothes into your undersized suitcase, irrationally convinced that you’ll make it all fit? Well, in Japan, they do the same thing, except with people onto a busy train. Allow us to explain. Tokyo is home to one of the busiest metro systems in the world, which is why railway companies hire people pushers, or “oshiya,” to stuff crowds of people onto the train so the doors can close. Oddly, commuters appear unphased. So, if you believe that pushing people around for a living will improve your self-esteem, then there’s a career in Tokyo with your name on it.
This article was published in the July/August 2024 edition of Connect to Northern Westchester.
Colin Baird-Taylor
