Connecting the World, One Step at A Time

Writing by Robin Goetz

To the naked eye, it’s just a table. Distinctly 1950’s era, its enameled top is scuffed and dented, the result of thousands of steamy coffee mugs scraping and resting on its surface. The wooden spindle legs are chipped but still sturdy; they have held up an equal number of conversations, supporting leaning elbows, banging fists, lowered heads and slaps from laughter. For many, though, this isn’t just a table. It is THE table. The table that they credit to saving their lives. And it can be found in the kitchen of an unassuming yet beautiful estate right in Katonah.

Westchester is teeming with historical homes and landmarks—places that you read about in books, that are woven into the fabric of American history. These are places where battles were plotted, won and lost, and prominent figures were born, died and buried.

The battle that was fought and won in this Katonah kitchen—now a national historical landmark—may not be discussed in the classroom or celebrated on holidays, but it has made as much of an impact as any other monument, perhaps more.

This is Stepping Stones, the home of Bill and Lois Wilson – the founding father and mother, respectively, of A.A. (Alcoholics Anonymous) and Al-Anon Family Groups.

A destination for many 

While it is not the Eiffel Tower or Mount Rushmore, Stepping Stones decidedly tops the destination list for those who have been helped by A.A. The site is a mecca to A.A.’s two million members worldwide, thousands of whom make the pilgrimage to Katonah every year to see where it all began. The most emotional spot? That kitchen table, where the A.A. founder had his “lightning moment” during a heart-to-heart with a close friend, leading to his eventual sobriety. From that conversation, a massive movement was born.

“I have seen the burliest, toughest of men break down at that table,” says Sally Corbett-Turco, executive director of Stepping Stones. “People come with their sponsors, their families, and when they look at that table, they often comment that if that conversation hadn’t happened, they might not be alive today.”

The history of Stepping Stones is the stuff of a Hollywood movie. It began with a secret engagement, a whirlwind romance and a marriage in 1918 for Bill Wilson and Lois Burnham. Once a wealthy and successful stockbroker in NYC, Bill’s alcoholism and the Great Depression left the couple homeless in 1939. It is said that the couple lived in (or on) 51 different places—couchs, floors, spare bedrooms—over the course of two years.  It was during this time that the seeds for A.A. were planted, but it was at their home in Katonah, called Stepping Stones, where they truly blossomed.

In 1940, Helen Griffith, a wealthy actress whose husband suffered from, and died of, alcoholism, heard of the Wilson’s plight and offered to sell the Wilsons her two-story Dutch Colonial and its six-acre property for a song. Some say the name Stepping Stones came from the steps leading downhill to the garage, but other folklore credits the moniker to the now famous 12-step program that Wilson conceptualized there.

A skilled archivist

A tour of Stepping Stones is like traveling back in time, as if Bill and Lois just stepped out for a quick bite. The throw pillows sewn by Lois, the piano Bill bought in prosperous times (a receipt for a whopping $1,600 is on view), the desk made by Bill’s grandfather, even the rows of dozens of coffee cups and an ancient percolator seem to be on standby, awaiting the 30–40 drop-in guests the couple would receive and entertain every weekend in their cozy living room.

And then there are the archives. The hero of this part of the tale is Lois, an avid, detailed archivist who can be credited for the endless writings, mementos, photos and artifacts that she scrupulously collected, chronicled and preserved. It has been said that when Bill was writing what is known as the “Big Book,” the cornerstone of A.A., Lois would retrieve his wadded papers from the trash, smooth them and save them for posterity, having the foresight that the work he was doing would be legendary.

The Wilsons also enlisted the help of a young woman named Nell Wing to help with Bill’s correspondence and writing, as well as the archival work. Nell practically lived at Stepping Stones for many years and was like a daughter to Bill and Lois, who were unable to have their own children. “Nell’s Room” can be seen on a Stepping Stones tour, preserved in the same manner as the rest of the property.

Stepping Stones houses an astonishing 100,000+ pieces in its archives, meticulously catalogued by Lois. She even tracked and filed all donations, newsletter subscriptions and local business partnerships on a handwritten ledger, which, of course, is on display.

These pieces of history are kept throughout the main house as well as Bill’s writing studio, famously nicknamed Wit’s End, where even more treasures can be found.

Spreading the word

One of the most striking relics is found at Wit’s End—a U.S. map from 1941—punctured with what seems like an endless stream of color-coded push pins, representing A.A. members and meetings all over the country. The meetings were tracked by what is still called the General Service Office (GSO) where A.A. members, or alcoholics seeking help, would call in to get connected to a meeting or sponsor.

Most remarkable, perhaps, wasn’t just this impressive method of tracking in a pre-internet age, but the pins that represented a “lone alcoholic.” These were people who wanted help but had no established meetings in their area. The GSO logged their information and location, and when an A.A. member, a salesman, perhaps, was traveling, they would call in to see if there was someone in need at their destination.

Bill also used a map to track the war’s daily progress and battlefronts. A patriot at heart, he even tried to re-enlist for World War II at age 46, but he was rejected more than once because the army thought the stress of the battlefront was no place for a recovering alcoholic. 

Ironically, the military is one of the ways A.A. spread throughout the world. Sober military members carried the message of recovery and started groups where they were stationed around the world, even in combat zones.

Today, Alcoholics Anonymous is a global organization, with over two million members in over 180 nations worldwide. There are more than 123,000 A.A. groups around the world, and the organization’s numerous literature have been translated into over 100 languages.

The definition of community

In 2023, almost 4,000 visitors from dozens of countries made the journey to Stepping Stones to reflect, learn and sit down to play a tune in the Wilson’s living room, just like in the old days. A.A. members, sponsors, family members and history buffs came to take this unique and significant walk-through time.

For those who cannot make it to Stepping Stones or have been and want to remain connected, the Stepping Stones Foundation began an online archive in November 2022, virtually opening the doors of Stepping Stones to a broader audience. To date, the archive features over 110,000 documents and artifacts in the archival collection.

While A.A. is a completely self-sufficient entity (meaning donations ONLY come from members), the Foundation has a mission to foster the understanding of alcoholism and inspire recovery, which includes preserving and sharing the home and its collection of historic treasures. They accept and rely upon financial donations as well as sweat equity: Volunteers throughout the world have been, and continue to be, an integral part of making, transcribing and translating archival documents.

“As a nonprofit organization committed to the professional preservation of the original material left in our care, we greatly appreciate support of our mission,” says Corbett-Turco. “The unique material and aging structures require special preservation expertise that can be costly and time consuming.”

In addition to tours, Stepping Stones opens its doors to the community in other ways. Every summer, Stepping Stones hosts the annual “Lois’s Family Group Picnic,” a family celebration of recovery where 500 members and their families from all over the world come together at the Wilson’s home. The day features speakers from Al-Anon, Alcoholics Anonymous and Alateen, a group for children of people with alcoholism. Corbett-Turco says the celebration embodies the spirit of the Wilsons, who opened their home to anyone, at any time. This June, they will host their 73rd picnic; it’s one of the oldest traditions in the 12-Step recovery community. Guests enjoy packed lunches, fellowship, wandering the gardens in bloom, hearing the piano played in the Wilson’s living room and touring the museum spaces.

To cultivate the local community in the neighborhoods surrounding the property, Stepping Stones offers free plots for anyone who would like to grow their own vegetables in Lois’s garden.

This year marks the 45th anniversary of the Stepping Stones Foundation as well as the 85th anniversary of the printing of the “Big Book,” which has been reproduced over 40 million times and counting.

“Stepping Stones is a special and powerful place for anyone, whether you are a part of A.A. or not,” says Corbett-Turco. “It is a place of hope, perseverance, recovery and community, and people leave here energized and inspired.”

This article was published in the May/June 2024 print edition of Connect to Northern Westchester.